Thursday, December 4, 2014

More about how I dealt with depression

I shared this with an acquaintance on Tumblr, and I thought I'd share it with you:
Well, when it started I didn't do much at all and so it got worse. I started to shut out my friends and I didn't talk to anyone at all if I could avoid it. As cliche as it may sound music was great therapy to me. When I was angry I listened to angry music and when I was sad I listened to sad. I realized that the music was helping me feel like someone understood and was, in a way, pushing these hidden emotions to the surface. That was the first step. I had to confront my anger, fear, and thoughts that I kept pushed down in my heart/mind. Journaling kind of helped with that. After I got the feelings to the "surface" I thought that if music could do that, I'm sure it could help bring me back to socializing and just life in general as a "new person". So I started listening to bands like All Time Low that had songs about being happy, and putting your cares away. Just anything that had that pop punk sound that made me happy. The music reminded me that there's a whole world outside of myself that I can't let slip by, because down the road I would have missed all of this because I needed to deal with my internal issues.Also, I pray. If that's not your thing, just find a way to release these emotions outward (like journaling). It's nice to get them out, and talking helped calm me down when I was stressed. Slowly I chose friends that I could seriously talk to about this. And it's still a struggle sometimes to get out there and do things. Like tonight I'm going to this festival thing with a friend and my instinct is to stay home but I'm forcing myself to go because I need to get out of the house. I still criticize myself and kinda beat myself up, but I think about life and the darkness I was in a month ago and I decide to not dwell on that insignificant issue anymore. I also learned that dealing with a problem upfront will cause less pain emotionally down the line.

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