Here it is

      I know I haven't posted on here in a while but I have reasons, and many apologies that will suffice for my absence, As you know, I dropped out of the college scholarship program over the summer. Since then, I've been bombarded with university brochures and I'm saving them all to take a picture of at the end of my senior year. It's insanity! This post may not be the longest thing I've written, or the best explained. I thought you at least deserve to know what has been going on.

I'm still clueless as to what my future career will be, but I shouldn't have to know at a mere 17 (almost 18) years of age. I am going to travel. Work odd jobs, and find myself in the years ahead. I'm not going to university and that is the last I want to say about that whole situation.

I haven't been going to church on Wednesday night, instead I've been doing an amazing Bible study that was loaned to me by a good friend. I still attend on Sunday because that makes me happy. I wish to not have to explain myself where that situation is concerned as well.

The real reason why I haven't been updating on here is because I went through, and am currently working my way out of a battle with depression. I'm not joking around or saying I'm depressed to get attention, same as me saying I'm lactose intolerant. I love cheese and attention seeking is not what I aim for. Knock-down depressive feelings have been rummaging through my most happiest places and it really sucks. Those are mine. I wish it would flee but thoughts still linger here and there. I wasn't trying to neglect you, I decided not to share those dingy thoughts with the world. No worries, suicide never crossed my mind.

I saw people happy and wanted so much to have that happiness but couldn't find a way to experience it myself. So I drowned myself in the uplifting melodies of hopeless dreamers and people that found their way out. I feel that music has been a huge push to get me out of that state I was in. I owe a lot of thanks to my friends Angelina and Katie for showing me a flood of bands that have helped them. I really can't thank them enough for what they may have viewed as simply letting me borrow their cds. In every possible way, it was much more, so thank you.

I'm planning on making a "masterlist" of all the albums they had me listen to, and my opinions on each. That will be a process, and it might be what I do over the next month. I hope that will be enjoyable to you, and I am open for suggestions if you have any!

Again, thanks for hanging around and remember that life has so much in store for you,

Erinn xx